everyday things

Blueberries are my favorite berries.
I hate purses. HATE. HATE.
Coffee is the best. laxative. ever.
I like watching people bicycle up hills. I like to see if they show any facial twist and I like to see bulging muscles. Oh, the joy in watching pain without feeling it.
I've learned that I cannot write songs. They are SO weird.
I want to live in a cabin. In Maine.
If I have kids, I definitely want more boys than girls.
I have signature spastic hiccups.
I just painted my fingernails gold to keep me from biting them. I've scraped off the bottom part of polish and have proceeded to peel the skin around the cuticle. Can you say... self-masochist? Yikes.
Laughing Cow Cheese=felicity.
I haven't read a whole book in like...4 weeks. This is strange.
Stein is a fish who lives in our office. He is a goldfish. I call him Steiny. Laura feeds him because she remembers these things. I like to watch him swirl around in his floaty string-poop and quote Finding Nemo.
I eat Tums like candy. In 3 weeks, I've almost eaten half the bottle. :/
My bladder...is an exact replica of my father's, I think.
Ella's hilarious quotes are finding their way into my everyday vernacular. Great progress, Jamie, now you're talkin' like a 2-year-old.
Here me COMES!
That's right, world. Me is coming.