I think I'm pushing myself to do things for 'the last time' before I leave, and isn't that funny?
"Oh, I wanna eat sushi one more time before Tonga!" "Let's walk the farm one last time!" "Let's get DQ blizzards ONE more time" (which I'm sure will be like...every night. Let's face it, I love a blizzard.)
I'm eating lunch with a friend in 15 minutes, tonight is my last day of church at Hillvue, tomorrow is my last haircut and my last party with my Bowling Green friends/best friends in the world, Friday will be my last day with my brother in law, Friday night will be my last time of seeing Beauty and the Beast (live! woohoo!) AND my last night on campus, Saturday will be my last get-together with the family, and Sunday will be full of packing, stressing, preparing, clothes-scrambling, dancing (it relieves stress for me), and playing the piano for the last time.
UGH. Sentimentality gets on my nerves. I think it strikes a nerve in me where my anatomical alarm system says, "Abort! Abort! Detach! Get away!", yet my human self wants to sit in the middle of my ginormous suitcase in a pile of zip-lop bags and long hippie skirts while singing "Leaving on a Jet Plane" between sobs.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Monday, September 27, 2010
6 Days Left! Update
I just got back from a wonderful weekend in Louisville and, let me tell you, I've hit the ground running. I tutor tonight, have Bible study tomorrow, church on Wed. (as well as my sis and her family come in), haircut and party on Thursday, Beauty and the Beast the Musical on Friday at WKU (yay!), party on Saturday, church and extreme-packing on Sunday, and I leave from Nashville at 12-something to fly to Dallas and then LA for staging. Holy crazy brain, batman!
A lot of you have asked about postage info and all that jazz. Let me just TELLLLL you the small plan that I know :)
I arrive in Nuku'alofa (the main Tongan island) and stay in a guest house for a few days. Then, we take a 35 minute plane ride (8-10 hours by boat...holy cow!) to Ha'apai, where I will live with a host family until early December. I will receive my PC training in Ha'apai and, if and when I get sworn in on Dec. 15, I will find out where my service actually is...AKA "Name That Island!"
In Nuku'alofa...or maybe it's Ha'apai, we will receive cell phones and I'll buy phone cards to call America. Also, there are internet cafes on both islands, so I'll have email access, etc. However, I won't get a lot of opportunities to do the whole email thing during training because the program is pretty darn intensive, and they encourage us to use most of our down time to hang out with our host family and socialize with others to improve our Tongan speech and relationships with others. That was a huge run-on sentence and I'm too tired to fix it, so sorry.
Also: several of you have said you wanted to send care packages. That is AWESOME and greatly appreciated! I'm sure in a few months I"ll know what i DEFINITELY need, but a lot of it also depends on which island I'm on once I start teaching. I know that feminine products there are either crappy or nonexistent, so any box of tampons/ pads/pantiliners will be welcomed with open arms. Other things like shampoo/condit., razors, soap, American candy, and letters are definitely and warmly accepted.
I should warn that the mail takes 4-6 weeks...the mail service in Tonga seems a big lax, and they also warn not to send anything valuable. If at all possible, send stuff in a padded envelope...boxes tend to be opened and swiped, so...yeah! (Silly Tongans.)
Another word about communication: I hope to start a brand new blog that is only for my PC service. I know it has to be approved once I'm there, and I can't reveal certain information, but I'm hoping that will work. If you have any ideas as to a title, please let me know. Right now, I'm still feeling "LOST: the Tonga Chronicles." It may be a little melo-dramatic, but I'm totally up for suggestions. :)
A lot of you have asked about postage info and all that jazz. Let me just TELLLLL you the small plan that I know :)
I arrive in Nuku'alofa (the main Tongan island) and stay in a guest house for a few days. Then, we take a 35 minute plane ride (8-10 hours by boat...holy cow!) to Ha'apai, where I will live with a host family until early December. I will receive my PC training in Ha'apai and, if and when I get sworn in on Dec. 15, I will find out where my service actually is...AKA "Name That Island!"
In Nuku'alofa...or maybe it's Ha'apai, we will receive cell phones and I'll buy phone cards to call America. Also, there are internet cafes on both islands, so I'll have email access, etc. However, I won't get a lot of opportunities to do the whole email thing during training because the program is pretty darn intensive, and they encourage us to use most of our down time to hang out with our host family and socialize with others to improve our Tongan speech and relationships with others. That was a huge run-on sentence and I'm too tired to fix it, so sorry.
Also: several of you have said you wanted to send care packages. That is AWESOME and greatly appreciated! I'm sure in a few months I"ll know what i DEFINITELY need, but a lot of it also depends on which island I'm on once I start teaching. I know that feminine products there are either crappy or nonexistent, so any box of tampons/ pads/pantiliners will be welcomed with open arms. Other things like shampoo/condit., razors, soap, American candy, and letters are definitely and warmly accepted.
I should warn that the mail takes 4-6 weeks...the mail service in Tonga seems a big lax, and they also warn not to send anything valuable. If at all possible, send stuff in a padded envelope...boxes tend to be opened and swiped, so...yeah! (Silly Tongans.)
Another word about communication: I hope to start a brand new blog that is only for my PC service. I know it has to be approved once I'm there, and I can't reveal certain information, but I'm hoping that will work. If you have any ideas as to a title, please let me know. Right now, I'm still feeling "LOST: the Tonga Chronicles." It may be a little melo-dramatic, but I'm totally up for suggestions. :)
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
I Am Jamie, Dragon-Fighter of the High School World
Last night I had my third dream of fighting a dragon. The dragon is the same one from Sleeping Beauty, so I guess I was the female Prince Phillip. The other two times, I had this awesome sword--a really long one, one only a super strong heroine could handle--so upon my entry in my high school's gym, AKA Dragon Lair, I immediately poked out both its eyes and as it thrashed around, I cut off its head. Bam. Done. Heroine, woot woot!
Not this time. This time I kept running through the hallway where all my math and science classes were, watching the brave souls go in and out of the gym. As far as I know, no one was hurt/killed, but I do remember dressing up in this weird costume and watching two random people from high school dress as Hansel and Gretl in the wing bathroom.
Then someone gave me a dagger. He said, "Here's your dagger, Jamie. You must poke out both its eyes" (which I remembered,) "and then cut off its head."
Woah, turbo: problem here. First of all, I weighed the dagger according to my human calculations as the blade broke off its plastic handle. I snapped it back together thinking, "Okay, not my uber-awesome sword, hmmmm."
Basically, I spent the rest of the time in the bathroom, watching Hansel and Gretl discuss their distraction plan, then I would go in the double doors of the gym and just wait in the lobby, watching the dragon throw a security card across the gym and out the window. Oh yeah, there was one fatality, I assume.
Then, before I knew it, the principal came in, called for lunch break, and the dragon was tamed while all the students went into the gym/cameleon cafeteria to eat hoagies and such. I kept snapping my dagger on and off its handle, thinking there was no way to poke out the dragon's eyes with something the length of my forearm. And plastic.
Not this time. This time I kept running through the hallway where all my math and science classes were, watching the brave souls go in and out of the gym. As far as I know, no one was hurt/killed, but I do remember dressing up in this weird costume and watching two random people from high school dress as Hansel and Gretl in the wing bathroom.
Then someone gave me a dagger. He said, "Here's your dagger, Jamie. You must poke out both its eyes" (which I remembered,) "and then cut off its head."
Woah, turbo: problem here. First of all, I weighed the dagger according to my human calculations as the blade broke off its plastic handle. I snapped it back together thinking, "Okay, not my uber-awesome sword, hmmmm."
Basically, I spent the rest of the time in the bathroom, watching Hansel and Gretl discuss their distraction plan, then I would go in the double doors of the gym and just wait in the lobby, watching the dragon throw a security card across the gym and out the window. Oh yeah, there was one fatality, I assume.
Then, before I knew it, the principal came in, called for lunch break, and the dragon was tamed while all the students went into the gym/cameleon cafeteria to eat hoagies and such. I kept snapping my dagger on and off its handle, thinking there was no way to poke out the dragon's eyes with something the length of my forearm. And plastic.
Monday, September 20, 2010
The Single Lady's Blues
(an excerpt from "The Happy Blues", an unfinished/un-started work of Jamie Ogles.)
Would you be a doll? Would you do me a
small
favor, see, I don't want
your flavor,
I want your arm,
see? The shoulder and elbow, no harm
done unless your fingers go numb with the weight of my head
on your bicep, the dreaded
tingle that bites around the nerves;
the single favor I ask won't hurt--
I'm an unskilled tease and a dreadful flirt,
and I want no funny business, mister;
I want the shoe without the blister,
the cake without a fork,
the wine with an inpenetrable cork--wait,
no, I like wine.
Nevermind
then, I'll just take
the arm for sanity's sake,
where I'll sleep and dream of shoes and cake
and wine while you
choose how to intertwine your fingers in mine,
and please,
take your time.
Would you be a doll? Would you do me a
small
favor, see, I don't want
your flavor,
I want your arm,
see? The shoulder and elbow, no harm
done unless your fingers go numb with the weight of my head
on your bicep, the dreaded
tingle that bites around the nerves;
the single favor I ask won't hurt--
I'm an unskilled tease and a dreadful flirt,
and I want no funny business, mister;
I want the shoe without the blister,
the cake without a fork,
the wine with an inpenetrable cork--wait,
no, I like wine.
Nevermind
then, I'll just take
the arm for sanity's sake,
where I'll sleep and dream of shoes and cake
and wine while you
choose how to intertwine your fingers in mine,
and please,
take your time.
Conrad, Shakespeare, and Poetry-Reciting Sex
I finally finished Heart of Darkness today. It was my nemesis in AP English my senior year of high school, and when I read the last word (darkness, of course,) I felt a burning, putrid passion of I-hate-Joseph-Conrad-ism, combined with an overwhelming relief of "Oh thank the LORD I can finally read something else now!" Of course, that "something else" became Jane Austen. And hopefully by now, you know that Jane Austen is my girl crush of the 19th century. Her writing is boring and it is formulaic but it is awesome! I love her characters. I swear Mr. Darcy lives in a tiny little tube thingy of my heart. He does. It's probably why I'm still single.
Anyway, that's neither here nor there. I'm writing about Heart of Darkness because my literature-loving nerd-self now likes this book. I can't say I love it. But I like it. I respect it. I understand (in a sense,) its essence. Yeah. Anyway.
My favorite part is when Marlowe says,
"You know I hate, detest, and can't bear a lie, not because I am straighter than the rest of us, but simply because it appalls me. There is a taint of death, a flavour of mortality in lies--which is exactly what I hate and detest in the world--what I want to forget."
Ohhh, it is so beautiful! I mean we're taught that lying is bad. It is sin, it is dirty, it is detestable to God. It is natural to we humans because we are dirty and detestable, and let's face it, sinning is what we do best.
But for a human to hate lies. That's pretty awesome. He hates it because it APPALLS him--the TAINT of death, "the flavour of mortality in lies" (that's my favorite part...oh, the language!)
I watched Shakespeare In Love today. I hadn't seen it in forever and I love Gwyneth Paltrow, and I forgot how GOOD Joseph Fiennes was. And his brother Ralph, who I totally have a crush on after The English Patient. But anyway, so the writers of this movie did such a creative job in mirroring the life/written works of Shakespeare to the life of the author and his new lover, Viola.
They meet when she, a total lover of Shakespeare's works, disguises herself as a man to try out for one of his plays. (Men were only allowed to act...no women. Ugh patriarchies.) So she ends up being pretty much the best, so she gets the part of Romeo, then he discovers she's this dreamy beautiful woman, they get hot and steamy while simultaneously reciting the lines from Romeo and Juliet to each other. (It totally beats Nora Roberts' sex scenes. For real.)
Of course, she has to marry this terrible a-hole (Colin Firth...ahhh, love,) and by the end she is discovered as a woman, but Queen Elizabeth totally defends and lies for her, but Viola still has to leave for America with yucky Wessex. However, because of this experience, Shakespeare writes Twelfth Night, one of my favorite comedies.
To make a long story long, the lying passage from Heart of Darkness just reminds me of this love triangle thing from Shakespeare in Love. The love between William and Viola is true, but the pretense is all false... they can't marry, they can't defy the whole social network, lalala. Lies are mortal because they eventually fizzle out, they have an end, they fester until they ooze out, leaving nothing but a scab behind.
But if you've ever read Shakespeare's sonnets (My Mistress' Eyes, for example), the lies of men bring out the truth in other men.
Maybe I'm getting all "love is truth, truth is beauty, beauty is freedom" and whatnot, which totally makes me want to watch Moulin Rouge again, but I guess this is what happens when I read literature and ponder over it for a couple of weeks.
And I'm considering taking a book of Shakespearean comedies with me to Tonga. Hmm...
Anyway, that's neither here nor there. I'm writing about Heart of Darkness because my literature-loving nerd-self now likes this book. I can't say I love it. But I like it. I respect it. I understand (in a sense,) its essence. Yeah. Anyway.
My favorite part is when Marlowe says,
"You know I hate, detest, and can't bear a lie, not because I am straighter than the rest of us, but simply because it appalls me. There is a taint of death, a flavour of mortality in lies--which is exactly what I hate and detest in the world--what I want to forget."
Ohhh, it is so beautiful! I mean we're taught that lying is bad. It is sin, it is dirty, it is detestable to God. It is natural to we humans because we are dirty and detestable, and let's face it, sinning is what we do best.
But for a human to hate lies. That's pretty awesome. He hates it because it APPALLS him--the TAINT of death, "the flavour of mortality in lies" (that's my favorite part...oh, the language!)
I watched Shakespeare In Love today. I hadn't seen it in forever and I love Gwyneth Paltrow, and I forgot how GOOD Joseph Fiennes was. And his brother Ralph, who I totally have a crush on after The English Patient. But anyway, so the writers of this movie did such a creative job in mirroring the life/written works of Shakespeare to the life of the author and his new lover, Viola.
They meet when she, a total lover of Shakespeare's works, disguises herself as a man to try out for one of his plays. (Men were only allowed to act...no women. Ugh patriarchies.) So she ends up being pretty much the best, so she gets the part of Romeo, then he discovers she's this dreamy beautiful woman, they get hot and steamy while simultaneously reciting the lines from Romeo and Juliet to each other. (It totally beats Nora Roberts' sex scenes. For real.)
Of course, she has to marry this terrible a-hole (Colin Firth...ahhh, love,) and by the end she is discovered as a woman, but Queen Elizabeth totally defends and lies for her, but Viola still has to leave for America with yucky Wessex. However, because of this experience, Shakespeare writes Twelfth Night, one of my favorite comedies.
To make a long story long, the lying passage from Heart of Darkness just reminds me of this love triangle thing from Shakespeare in Love. The love between William and Viola is true, but the pretense is all false... they can't marry, they can't defy the whole social network, lalala. Lies are mortal because they eventually fizzle out, they have an end, they fester until they ooze out, leaving nothing but a scab behind.
But if you've ever read Shakespeare's sonnets (My Mistress' Eyes, for example), the lies of men bring out the truth in other men.
Maybe I'm getting all "love is truth, truth is beauty, beauty is freedom" and whatnot, which totally makes me want to watch Moulin Rouge again, but I guess this is what happens when I read literature and ponder over it for a couple of weeks.
And I'm considering taking a book of Shakespearean comedies with me to Tonga. Hmm...
Sunday, September 19, 2010
i'm too tired to say something metaphorical
bedtime- 12:30/1-ish am
wake-up time- 5:55 am
singy choir time- 7:15 am
breakfast time- 8-something
singy choir time over- 11:30
friend time- 12:45
hikey time- 2-something
homey time- 6
supper time- 6:01
movie time- 7-present
bedtime- now? (8:45 ish)
leavey time- 14 days
wake-up time- 5:55 am
singy choir time- 7:15 am
breakfast time- 8-something
singy choir time over- 11:30
friend time- 12:45
hikey time- 2-something
homey time- 6
supper time- 6:01
movie time- 7-present
bedtime- now? (8:45 ish)
leavey time- 14 days
Friday, September 17, 2010
Woohoo! I love good days!
I look totally awesome right now. I just cleaned my car--literally--for 2+ hours straight. I vaccumed it, cleaned/polished the inside, (even INSIDE the doors...like the gross greasy parts,) and finally washed the outside. It doesn't sound like a lot, but it was.
I broke a major sweat and I even have grease swipes on my arm. It makes me feel sexy, you know. Reor.
Then the mail lady drove up to hand me the mail, asking me about my life in a nutshell right now. Her daughter just got back from China and is about to head to England, so I decided she was probably open-minded enough to accept my Peace Corps life with enthusiasm. She was absolutely kind, and said to have an extra eye, because no matter how good of deeds we try to do, people are always eyeing Americans. So she asked me to be careful and then said "God will be with you, sweetie!" She was nice. I love meeting kind strangers. It makes me happy.
I also had a good time with my grandma today. I've been doing a lot of stuff around the house for her--I mean she's 90...holy cow--and so she pays me just to do little odd jobs. Then we ate lunch together and she asked a lot of questions about Tonga and what I'd do, etc. Then she said something really funny--she and my mom both do it ALL the time. Like when a bad word is appropriate, they both say "sht" like that or "sssst" and it's kind of a fill-in minus the vowel. It's hilarious. So I told her a story about when Mom said shit when she and Dad were having a playful argument-- seriously, it was hilarious--and Mema laughed so hard she was wiping tears.
It was nice--I like when Mema laughs and tells stories. It's fun. It's always been hard to bond with her because she's always been so much older; plus she always tried to talk me out of playing ball and talk me into taking piano lessons even after I quit. But now she's become a lot more accepting of me. Or maybe I've become more accepting of her.
As of now, the countdown is 17 days. Isn't that crazy? I don't feel crunched for time or uber stressed. Maybe my subconscious does because my face is breaking out again and my fingernails are bloody and down to the nubs. Oh well. I'm happy.
I broke a major sweat and I even have grease swipes on my arm. It makes me feel sexy, you know. Reor.
Then the mail lady drove up to hand me the mail, asking me about my life in a nutshell right now. Her daughter just got back from China and is about to head to England, so I decided she was probably open-minded enough to accept my Peace Corps life with enthusiasm. She was absolutely kind, and said to have an extra eye, because no matter how good of deeds we try to do, people are always eyeing Americans. So she asked me to be careful and then said "God will be with you, sweetie!" She was nice. I love meeting kind strangers. It makes me happy.
I also had a good time with my grandma today. I've been doing a lot of stuff around the house for her--I mean she's 90...holy cow--and so she pays me just to do little odd jobs. Then we ate lunch together and she asked a lot of questions about Tonga and what I'd do, etc. Then she said something really funny--she and my mom both do it ALL the time. Like when a bad word is appropriate, they both say "sht" like that or "sssst" and it's kind of a fill-in minus the vowel. It's hilarious. So I told her a story about when Mom said shit when she and Dad were having a playful argument-- seriously, it was hilarious--and Mema laughed so hard she was wiping tears.
It was nice--I like when Mema laughs and tells stories. It's fun. It's always been hard to bond with her because she's always been so much older; plus she always tried to talk me out of playing ball and talk me into taking piano lessons even after I quit. But now she's become a lot more accepting of me. Or maybe I've become more accepting of her.
As of now, the countdown is 17 days. Isn't that crazy? I don't feel crunched for time or uber stressed. Maybe my subconscious does because my face is breaking out again and my fingernails are bloody and down to the nubs. Oh well. I'm happy.
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